Serenity Pathways

Archive for the ‘Play’ Category

Who knew after a lot of work the “pause” in our normal routine would be so refreshing. We had our (now after three years) “normal” company for Labor Day weekend.  To get ready we  did more than usual.  You know how it is and what you think you have to do when you have six additional people coming to your house to stay for 4 days!  This summer was odd; we had not done as much work outside as we usually do, so we did more than the usual weekly clean up in preparation. With the rain and rapid growth on the outside there was a lot to be done!  Plus we decided to paint one of the bedrooms.

Although it’s still very hot here in Florida, I knew that after this weekend I’d want to get back into work without thinking about changing my house into fall. (Yes, I am one who likes to decorate for the seasons down to my couch pillows.)  So I did that too!

The weekend turned out to be a much bigger “pause” in our normal routines than I had thought it would be.  We all had so much fun together and in small groups.   The planning paid off so it didn’t feel like we had to work at all for everyone to feel comfortable. It seemed like a luxury to spend that much time relaxing and just having fun!  I am always amazed at the magic of taking a real break – a pause from everything else.  I’m the Queen of mini pauses and quick breaks but every once in awhile taking a big pause really refreshes.  I didn’t worry about what I had to do this week or what I wasn’t doing. I know that’s the key!  Things moved with ease and my week has fallen into place easily!

Try hitting  the “pause” button!  Take a quick pause and work up to the longer ones. Don’t forget to hit the pause button on the “what I have to do” thoughts too!!!

Post your favorite way to pause,

Bonnie

PS If you want to hear more about “the magic of the pause button” tune in on Tuesday, September 14 at 6:00 PM ET to blogtalkradio.com/lea-yekutiel.  If you can’t make it, the recording will be there. There are other great shows to list with wonderful guests, too.

Small, bite-size… simple… quiet (despite the masses) … clean and elegant was my impression after traveling to Japan with my daughter last week. I loved being immersed in the local culture so different from ours here in the States.

On the subways, despite all the travelers, it was silent except a few quiet conversations. There was a strict rule, no audible cell phone talking or phones ringing. You have to put your cell phone on vibrate or quiet mode. This information was posted with the next stop information on the flashing panel, in Japanese and English, on most trains.

It was humorous to watch these quiet, respectful people texting, yes, but the bigger event was watching them play games on their phones. Games were certainly the popular choice on many neon-colored, large homogeneous-looking big screen phones.  There was still a large collection of  people on our subway rides, which were many, quietly sitting or “napping” and with only a few quiet conversations.  Who knows what they were saying since my daughter and I don’t speak Japanese. Only once during the entire week did we hear anyone raise their voice anywhere we traveled.

Even at temples, stores, markets, subways, and down streets crowded with people, it was much quieter than you would expect. During the entire trip, it continued to amaze me, despite the close quarters and hundreds and hundreds of people, how quiet it was. I also enjoyed the spotlessly clean streets, bathrooms, and subways.  (Just a side note, not everywhere was quiet. When we were in one of many arcades that Japan features it was definitely NOT quiet.)

The Japanese people radiated a sense of peace with their respect to others and quiet. They were always saying thank you and many times bowing to you with a smile. (I now know the word thank you in Japanese.) That’s how they treat everyone.  I know we drew attention with our blond hair, light skin and odd-looking clothing and shoes. Japan is country with few Europeans or Americans. We laughed as, a few times, very young children pointed us out to their mothers.  However, we were always treated with respect and kindness.

The Japanese seem to know how to take those quiet moments despite small, very crowded spaces and a very busy environment. In our Japanese business hotel each morning a breakfast area would magically appear in the lobby. While eating rice cakes and unidentified vegetables (I couldn’t eat the soup at 7 AM) I noticed again how quiet the crowded room was as we ate. Once again, there were a few conversation but they were soft and quiet.  It was rather amazing. I know a few years ago I found some articles that reported some Japanese companies were creating “quiet rooms” (with pillows and couches) and play rooms to give their employees a “stress  break.”

3 Simple Tips Japanese style for inner calm and peace

• Remember to say thank you from your heart and bow (inside) to every person you interact with each day. (Watch what happens!)
• Create quiet spaces for yourself during the day.  Turn off your radio, ipod and just be quiet  wherever you are.
• Be respectful using your cell phone, both ringing and talking. (Does everyone want to hear your side of the story?)

Welcome to SerenityPathway’s new blog The Natural Path to Being You, Ideas to Nourish Your Body, Mind and Spirit. The intention of Serenity Pathways’ (Blog, CDs, Coaching, Natural Path to Happiness© Modules, teleclasses, The Virtual Spa®, ebooks and products) is to create short, elegant pathways–stepping stones–for you to transform, create and keep a positive, loving connection to your body, mind and spirit.

Life Makeovers by Cheryl Richardson

“Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one’s own shadow.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson (from Life Makeovers by Cheryl Richardson)

I believe that everyone can connect to their authentic self and to an energy that is much greater than each of us individually (God, Spirit, Source, the Universe etc.) I also believe that when we connect to each other while being our authentic selves, we create a much better world. As your “best” and authentic self, you give a gift of you to yourself and the gift of you to the world. It’s energizing, joyful and fun. (You’re not a gift when you’re filled with drama, stress and anxiety. It just fills the world with more toxins.) You then inspire those around you to be their “best” selves.

Competing, being a victim and sacrificing was the old game. The new structures for us to build now are to allow ourselves to be just who we are using our gifts, strengths, and taking care of all parts of ourselves. That includes the obvious self care, as well as the deeper choice of being gentle and kind to ourselves.

Being your “best” and authentic self is a choice. You have a choice to do the self nurturing and self care that supports you being your authentic and fully-connected self or stay on the treadmill of more work and while keeping going and not stopping. If you choose to not stop, at some point you’ll fall off in exhaustion in one or all areas of your body, mind and spirit. Deeply honoring your body, mind and spirit is the choice that is important for your connection, health and wellbeing.

When you choose self care and self nurturing, you grow and are more abundant in every way. As each of us does that in our own way, our planet will shift and become a more joyful, healthier, safer place to live. We can certainly use that now!

I hope this blog will inspire you, give you practical information and be a place of community where you can all share your wisdom and gifts. I also hope that everyone reading the blog will find a short, elegant pathway that make will make life easier and more fun.

Wishing you the ease of the elegant butterfly,

Bonnie

How many times have you thought “I don’t have enough time to make a change, shift my thoughts to a more positive one or to do something different that I know would help?  Or how about the thought, “There are only 24 hours in a day?” (You have to whine a bit as you say that.)  If you don’t have control of your time, who does? I know we all have been caught with those thoughts of overwhelm and not enough time. On the other hand, have you ever been involved in a project where time flew by or, the opposite, you had so little to do you were bored?  What happened to time in those cases?  We have to live by the clock or “time” in some ways but how about……

…….energy management instead of time management.  It’s really all in your head how you think about time. I can hear you! Yes, there is a never-ending list of things in our overly busy and overwhelming world.  That isn’t going to change.  However, you can make an inside shift in your thoughts, you can watch your outside world change–even if is just a little bit.

For example, when you wake up jarred with an alarm or loud music, and then jump out of bed with a startle, it’s hard for your physical body to catch up with the inner wiser part of you. So try this before you get out of bed in the morning.  Take time in the morning to get your energy grounded and present in your body.  (You may want to catch those last drifts of important information from your sleep time, first.) When you’re a bit more awake, focus on your body–be gentle and allow yourself a few minutes to connect with yourself in the waking state.  Some people express gratitudes or thanks for the day.  Then ask, “What the priorities are for today? How can I use my energy most effectively today?”  Listen or write it down!  (This may come from your list that has a million to dos that would most likely fill a calendar for a month rather than a day.)

Next is my favorite part of this whole process.  It works so very, very well. Before you get out of bed ask yourself what strengths or gifts you have that would help you today?  Imagine that strength or gift filling you up, starting in the heart and circulating through your body. (Notice when that gift comes into play during your day.)

When you get out of bed and face the mirror (okay fine, don’t look in the mirror; do it on your way to the bathroom or brushing your hair), take a few deep breaths. Breathing helps all the thousands of processes in your physical body, connects your body and mind, and raises your energy.  This should only take a few minutes.  (If you are night person, you’ll want to ask for the priorities the night before and visualize your gifts then.)  Engaging in this process is one of the stepping stones on the Natural Path to Happiness©.

Try starting each day with this quick energy management shifter before you get out of bed. Then visit our blog and tell us what happened.  Making a shift is about you making a choice to take a few extra minutes to maximize your energy.  Taking time for you and choosing to take steps to self-nurture yourself is one only you can make. It’s all about energy management.  Some days we are much better at this than others.

Lastly, don’t forget to employ good “time and energy management” and organizational skills; check your email at designated times; keep some kind of list of what you need to do each day and for the week, label the most important etc. You can’t do it all. Ask yourself: Can I delegate something? What do I need to let go of and what do I keep? Is there a more efficient way to do things.

Shift your thoughts, manage your energy and watch for the miracles.

Happy quick and easy shifting,

Bonnie

P.S. After you have mastered that,  how can you make room for the next thing you want to do and have been putting off?

Relationships-We all know to enjoy them and have fun……we just forget!  Enjoy this one minute video of true friends and fun.  Remember the kid inside of you. ( I am not sure how they got some of those shots.) Remember the fun of being with friends. Call a friend this weekend-you’ll release those good chemicals, feel happier and be healthier!

http://tr.youtube.com/watch?v=Q2B_d_eBI6g

This will make you smile! Your boost for the day.

Happy Friday,

Bonnie

PS We are going dancing tonight. I can’t wait to have fun and meet new people.

 The problem with stress, being upset or frustrated is you want something you don’t have. . .more money, a relationship, or your kids to behave. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that’s what will make you happy. If you’re thinking that way, you are in the jaws of the happiness trap.

 Do you remember the old song “Don’t worry…….Be happy”? There’s more truth to that than you think. We could substitute the word overwhelm, scared, or anxious for the word worry. All these words translate into one word-FEAR-fear of losing something…….fear of something happening to us.Now, more than ever, is the time to sing the mantra “Don’t worry…….. Be happy.” (Funny, that’s all I can remember from the song.) As Marcia Shimoff in the title of her book says, be “Happy for No Reason” (now out in paperback).  Why, you ask with everything going on in my life, the world, and right here in our country? Why be happy? Because being happy, having the money you want, or having a perfect relationship isn’t the real source of happiness.  I used to think having everything I wanted was happiness too. We all have been fooled into thinking having those “things” is the solution.  It’s the seductive happiness trap. You know how it is when you get when you finally have the money you want or believe you’ve developed the perfect relationship?  It’s like a quick sugar rush, giving you a high just for a little while, then dropping you, sometimes even plummeting you, back down,  (Researchers call this you happiness set point.) Sugar and happiness highs don’t last.  You can savor and enjoy them in the moment to prolong them but those fleeting pleasures just don’t hold up in the long run of life.  But what is really the object of your affection? If you keep asking yourself questions, the final answer every time is what everyone wants–joy, peace and a feeling of wellbeing. That’s really the bottom line. Recently I caught myself thinking about what I couldn’t do because I didn’t have. I stopped for a moment, looked outside and here is what popped into my head. (I never know when Dr. Seuss will visit.) 

Be happy

No one said sappy

Just be happy the sky is a beautiful blue

So …………you have a lot to do

Find a way

To be able to say

It’s okay

Today, I will find some time to play

It’s all up to me

How to be 

It’s easier than you think

And quicker than a wink 

You have it all inside

Find where those happy feelings reside 

Because what makes you feel good

Is really all under your hood. 

Positive Emotion= More ChoicesAnd, just in case you don’t think songs or Dr. Seuss are reliable resources, studies have shown that just smiling and having a little fun can open up your mind and the neuropathways in your brain. When the brain is not hyper-focused on the problem, it opens to other possibilities and  new opportunities  It has been found through extensive research on positive emotion and resiliency  that positive emotions help you navigate the bumps in life by broadening  possible choices and actions in difficult or challenging situations.  Experiencing positive emotion daily builds up your reserves for the tougher times. Researcher, Barbara Fredrickson, PhD., says in her new book Positivity,  ”Positive emotion opens our hearts and our minds making us more receptive and more creative.” In her research she has found negativity–even neutrality–holds you back.  Negative or neutral emotions actually narrow your experiences making it feel like “having blinders” on.  Just a quick aside–early one morning (before I had gotten back to reading Fredrickson’s book that very day) my brother was describing his low mood and said he felt like he had “blinders on”.  I’m so glad I now have scientific evidence that he was telling the truth!  Being in a bad mood feels like blinders, limiting our options and leaving us with seemingly nowhere to go except straight ahead.  I know how easy it is to feel boxed in with the outside world realities. Do you want to fall in the happiness trap and keep those blinders on or trust what’s under your hood?  Take time to look inside! Yes, you may have to be still for a few minutes. Then, do whatever you need to, so you feel happy, content, joyful, fulfilled.  Laugh, play or just visualize a time you felt good!  Look, listen and then take action.  You never know what will show up in your world.  Be Happy…………..Don’t Worry,Bonnie  

P.S. Discover how to be happy…right now.Walk the Natural Path to Happiness Read a sample of Module 1:Smelling the Roses Pays off  – at (copy and paste url SerenityPathways.com/npth-down in the middle of the page).  You won’t want to miss  the bonus gift  ebook Calm Moves  when you purchase the Natural Path to Happiness Module 1. (first in a series of 8-you can buy just the first one)

What would you do if you had the time?
What would make you feel sublime?

Go ahead with haste
And take a leap of faith

Release resolutions
That’s only thought pollution

Take the time to dream
Then let your dreams ride on a moon beam

You’re not very far away
So just dream and say:

“My gifts and strengths will now appear
So I can run as easily as a deer”

Make your gifts work for you
And share with others too

Let your passions and dreams
Positively expand into multiple streams

Let yourself unwind
And become entwined

In your unique dreams and shine
For 2009

As you approach this New Year, remember how many resolutions you made in previous years. . .and then forgot within a few weeks. We know the deeper level of creating transformation or change in life is to dream. Have a vision, set your intentions, take action and receive. 2009 seems to be a very important year in a time of change and moving forward and creating better inner and outer worlds.

Although some of the outside realities don’t look so bright, we know that to see or experience the positive light, we must clean out and move through our inner darkness so it can reflect in our outer reality. We have been moving through many difficult times: endings of relationships, changes at work and in our bodies, and the up and down of our economy. In 2008 we continued the clearing and releasing on a personal level and as a global consciousness. In this past year, despite many difficulties, there seemed to be many positives and seeds being planted for sunnier days.

When I was approached to lead a Girls Night Out visioning evening, I started thinking about how important it is to really dream, to have a vision and a passion about what you want for yourself and your life. As you dream, you naturally incorporate your gifts, strengths, and passions into your dreams. (Who would dream about something they didn’t like?) When you dream you don’t stop yourself in the middle of your dream and say “How can I do this?” If you stop yourself the dream ends so, when you dream…… just dream.

Keep a journal and jot down your dreams, visions and passions so you’re ready for the next step to create your vision for 2009. I love dreaming, visualizing and experiencing the joy and happiness of my vision. The more I do this the more my vision expands and more details appear, paving the path for the next step.

So, this first week in January dream with the intention of being the person of your dreams living your passions as you move into the year 2009 for a brighter and lighter new brighter future.

** This article is the first in a four-week series on creating your visions, dreams and actions for 2009.

P.S. Not sure about your dreams? Stuck and would really like to be guided by your inner wisdom and write at the same time? If you said yes, you will love a new book just released by a friend of mine, Janet Conner, who is an extraordinary writier called Writing Down Your Soul: How to Activate and Listen to the Extraordinary Voice Within Check out the book and her website writingdownyoursoul.com

This summer you may find yourself wanting to have more fun, play and just daydream. Summer is the easiest season to find time for play, relaxation and fun. The warmer weather draws you outdoors more, you connect more frequently with family and friends…. and life just seems lighter and more fun. Summer is also a great time to let go of the “work, work, and more work” mentality.

Having fun, playing and relaxing can be good “training” for how to move more easily through the busier seasons of the year. So, as you’re experiencing the lightness of summer, tuck away the experiences so, during those busier seasons, you can remember what you felt and what you did to have fun during the summer. (You may even want to repeat those fun experiences, adjusting a bit for a colder season.)

As I am playing, time seems to stand still. As strange as it may seem, I still have plenty of time to do everything I need for the day or the week after spending time playing (as long as I don’t worry about getting things done or feel guilty about taking time away from my “work”). As one who loves her work, I have to remind myself although my “work” is my passion, it’s important to put play time in my schedule. Even my passion can become work and a struggle. When that happens, I find things just don’t move easily. I imagine the same is true for you.

Summertime is really a wonderful time to play outside in nature and let our natural resources refresh and ground us. (I really love it, however, when the bugs don’t join me for play time.) When you’re outside, whether it’s on the beach, in a boat, on a lake, playing a game with the kids, picnicking or just walking, it is a perfect opportunity to let nature comfort you, relax you and allow yourself to daydream.

This time of year I love to just breathe in and enjoy the lushness and beauty of nature. When I take a moment to do this, I always feel calmer and more peaceful. Even if I just take a few moments breathing in and watching nature, I regain my balance and a sense of peace. It doesn’t cost anything; not even a lot of time. As Eckhart Tolle reminds us in The New Earth and classes with Oprah, just looking at nature brings you into the present moment–the only moment you really have.

In the middle of writing my ezine and this blog, I was feeling a bit down and stuck with my new project. If you are thinking I needed to get out and play, you are right! I knew I had to do something that made me feel happier, more open and connected to nature. I actually put some sunscreen on, packed my chair, umbrella, notepad and headed to play at the beach. After playing in the water for awhile, I relaxed in my chair….. breathed in the wonderful air….watched the gulf….and breathed in the moment.

Just as naturally as the waves moving in and out, so did the words and ideas flow from within and out onto my paper. After I “played” in and on my project for a while, I let myself drift into a relaxed state–just breathing, watching nature and daydreaming.

I remembered everything has a cycle–a perfect timing. As you look around in nature, you know there is a perfect, underlying “operating system”. With all the chaos of the outside world, our dramas or the dramas of others, we sometimes forget to connect into the “larger operating system” with a divine timing, ease and flow.

7 Playful Summer Time Tips
* Schedule time for play, relaxation and fun-it will yield huge benefits for you
* Daydream about what you love and what makes you feel happy
* Do something creative or something that makes you happy
* Get outside in nature, breathe it in, and center yourself in the beauty of the outdoors
* Incorporate the idea of play into your “work”
* Do some of your “work” in another environment, perhaps outdoors
* Remember your “work” is just another part of “the game of life” as explain in this free download book written by Florence Schovel Shinn The Game of Life . Copy and past this link into your browser to get the free download book http://www.inspirationline.com/BEWorld/eBook1.htm

Enjoy play training and your game of life,

Bonnie